Wednesday, April 3, 2013

IIt's My Right, Damn it!

Maybe carrying the laptop and my cup of coffee to the patio wasn't such a great idea. The rain is falling in sheets to the concrete apron from gutters that were supposed to catch it from the roof and carry it away to the ends of the house. I think the husband has given up on the gutters and is no longer cleaning them. 

I am sitting here in a long floor length white satin gown, a delicate crocheted  neckline that has a pink ribbon woven through the crocheted part. This is a gown I used to wear when I visited my mother. She kept this in the closet along with the "whore red slinky satin" one. I wore both of them and when she passed on and bought them to my house. Usually they hang behind the door that is always left swung open so I forget they are there. I rediscovered them again yesterday and since I wasn't in a whoring mood,  wore the angelic one. OH MY! Did I offend anyone? OK..well..most things pass and this will too.

As I was gathering up my laptop, and my cup of coffee, I grabbed a blanket just on the off chance it might be a bit nippy out here.

Here I sit in my white floor length satin gown with a fuzzy knobby old brown blanket wrapped around me from neck to toes. The wind is gusting. I slip my hands out beneath the blanket  and sneak them to the keyboard and soon draw 
draw them back to shelter. 

When I painfully crawled from my bed, the first thing I did was eat a Lortab. I could hear the rain and the thunder beating against the house and I thought getting outside would be a good idea. As I sit here huddled beneath this raggedy old blanket, not so much.

A few days ago a post was made on Facebook and in reply I likened the Bible to a book of fairy tales, I have been watching the History Channel lately and it's a series on The Bible. It takes you through the stories we've all heard as children and some of us as adults start questioning the validity of them.

I love watching this show. Scientists and scholars explain much of what was happening during that time by carbon dating, geological digs, etc. solar flares, meteors and more. This I can understand and accept. Knowing that the first book of the New Testament was written 75 years AD does not do anything to solidify my belief in this book. Then the second book was written 175 years AD. Many books, especially those by women were entirely thrown out. How scientific can this book that is what we are to belief is believable? The stories mom told us were OK for a 7 yr old but as soon as I could sort and catalog  my thoughts, none of it made sense. You weren't allowed to question. Why? Oops..a question. 

Mary didn't ride an ass from Jerusalem to Nazareth. She was nine months preggers....and most of the children then died in childbirth and their mothers weren't on a hair brained race across a desert on an ass for days and days. Now they tell us he wasn't born in December and not even in a manager.

What DO you call a book written by people that believed a shooting star was a message from heaven? A woman turned to a pillar of salt, red sea, walking on water..and on and on.
Watch this series on the History Channel. It is something that can be believed.

I have been called an atheist because of my comment about the Bible. My comment to this, "you have judged and labeled me and as a Christian, that is not your place to do that."

Either be a good Christian or keep very quiet. Your unChristien ways is what keeps me from that Church every Sunday. We don't all worship in your way. Some of us kneel in flower beds, visit quiet places to meditate, or have a special place that is not made of brick and pillars. I don't think God is going to punish them.

My friends that know me well will say "I know how you feel about this but I'm going to say a prayer for you anyway. I'm grateful and never turn away a prayer. I feel this is their way of extending love for me. I extend best wishes, hugs and let them know that they are in my thoughts during trying times.

My one creedo: Do no harm. Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. That about covers everything for me.

My daughter talks to her children as my mother did to me. They will sort and question if they choose in their own time. 

I don't undertand religion. A lady commented "I wish I could believe as my brother does. I've tried but I just can't."

I know how she feels. It must be a comfort to those to believe what is told to them and what they read in the Bible. Make it factual. Make it correct and don't tell fairy tales to adults that are scientific minded and expect us to just believe.

I won't get into all the cults and lifes lost to those believers nor all the sexual conduct and cover ups by the people in high places. That church has lost a lot of followers and most of all a lot of money.

I sit and watch. Enjoy your religion. You have that right. I also have my right to be not judged by you and yours.


  1. Well, I can tell you are feeling a little better....that was very very well written, even though I have went to church my whole life, I still respect the beliefs of others, if Gods love is in you, you're going to love the non-believers anyway, and hope and pray that God somehow reveals himself to them. If he doesn't ..oh, well, I will never ever stop loving you...

  2. I was expecting as much. It seems being a Christian only works for them on their terms. It doesn't entice me to become one of them.

  3. I sometimes envy those who do believe, and the trmendous faith they have. It must be very rassuring, but as you know it's also not for me. I'm pretty disillusioned when it comes to the behaviour of some people who call themselves Christians, and for that matter devout Muslims (my eyes have been opened since living in this muslim country). My father in law is a case in point. A devout muslim who goes to mosque five times a day...doesn't make him a good person though.

    1. It usually comes back to the examples we see exhibited by those proclaiming to be holy. Even if I didn't let that sway me, I still have the issue with this divine being filled with love for us that lets children suffer atrocities at the hands of adults, the prison camps in WWII and the torture there. The little children mass
      shooting in Conn., those things I cannot understand. The priests of the Catholic Church and then the coverups. ....where is that divine being?


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