Monday, January 11, 2010

Tussle it Up

I waited around most of the day yesterday for the call to go pick up Carrie. Finally around 4PM I decided to just drive to Lydia and when the call came I would be already there and that's what I did. She was so tired she fell asleep in her car seat during the ride home. Her little head lolled to one side, her neck at a 90 degree angle which didn't look comfortable but she stayed in that position until we reached my carport. I had to piggy back carry her into the house and to the bedroom where she struggled awake; her nap was short.

I knew she was tired but she didn't want to sleep so awake she stayed. She and Poppy were tusslin it up as she calls it when they wrestle or spar verbally. Before long she migrated to the living room where I was watching TV and asked to play on the laptop. We set it up for her on the coffee table and she clicked into her games from the shortcut on the desktop of the computer. All is well, at least for a while. Soon she became unhappy with the game and her being unable to win and that's when she slammed her hands down on the keyboard of the computer and a few more poundings before I could reach out and stop her. It wasn't pretty! I scolded her for the abuse of my laptop and told her we were putting it away and she would not be playing with it again. At this, she jumps up and runs off screaming for her Poppy. He, of course defended her to which I said "She has to learn. She can't be behaving like that when she gets angry." She clung to his pant leg hiding behind him and peeking around at me all the while crying loudly and with much drama. I know that part of this over reacting was her lack of control but a large part of it was her need to sleep. She knew I was unhappy with her and I wanted her to know.
I motioned her to come to me so I could change her into her pajamas and she refused. I got firm in my request and she knew I wasn't playing. She came out from her place behind her Poppy and as I was stripping her clothes off to change her she threw her arms around my neck for a hug all the while apologizing for her behavior. She did try making excuses; blaming it on the computer and weasaling out of her bad conduct. I had to gently remind her that her behavior was the problem. She promised not to do it again and I think she meant more then banging the keyboard on the computer. She doesn't like it when I'm angry with her. I didn't have to issue corporal punishment. Letting her know I was unhappy with her was enough of a punishment for her. The remainder of the evening she stayed close to me and was very affectionate.
Bedtime and she asked to play on the laptop. I allowed her to open up the laptop and play a few games before lights out. She sat quietly and played her games and shut the laptop down gently and rolled over and claimed sleep. Today we will hopefully not "tussle it up". I hate tusslin.


  1. Gentle lessons.

    If I had done a better job of that when my son way young, I might not have had to call the police on him when he was older and belligerent, and growing marijuana in the attic under a high intensity lamp. His lessons were much harsher. Luckily - he's outgrown all of his awful behaviors and is a well-adjusted, hard working, drug-free, member of society. It was a long long road, though.

    I guess I never had nurturing attentive parents, so it was hard to role-model that with my own children. Don't get me wrong... I adored my children. Probably to a fault. What I lacked in parenting skills I made up for with indulgence. Somehow we all made it through and I'm much better prepared for grandparenthood.

    You sound like a wonderful grandma.


  2. A much better grandparent then a parent so don't issue kudos to me for parenting skills. Thankfully you learn as you go along and by the time the grandchildren arrive you have honed or acquired better skills!


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