Meltdown

It's sorta a meltdown kind of day today. I'm obsessing about what the Dr. said yesterday when I told him I had pain in the muscles of my leg and his response made me think this was abnormal. I finally spoke with a friend this morning about it and she told me about her friend that has had this surgery. He told her he was in pain for the first year. His muscles ached most of the time. After that first year he felt normal once again related to the knee. I'm so grateful that my friend called and told me this. Sometimes you just need to hear how it "will be someday". Something to look forward too.



I also think the doctors just have no clue what his patients feel related to the after effects of this surgery. Mine was questioning me as if this was not normal; the pain in the muscles. Then I think maybe he was just worried that it was the sciatica and was ruling that out by questioning me. I worry that after another 6 months of this the pain will be a constant with me and then I'll find out it's something that is awry with the knee and it should have been addressed earlier. That's a worry. On the other hand, this could and I hope it is, a normal part of the healing process.


I suppose time will tell! I try to post on here my thoughts and feelings about this so I can come back later and reassess. Also it might help someone who has had this surgery and is questioning the same things I question.



I was trying to remember if I've always felt this pain post op. No. I didn't but I think it started when I started walking more and exercising these muscles by all the walking. That would be a good thing. No pain no gain sorta thing.


Carrie left this morning to spend the coming week in Lydia, La. with her dad. I hope she gets homesick and calls for us to go get her but I doubt that will happen. She has her little buddies there that are the same age as she so she never tires of playing with them. I know she will have lots of fun and thats' a good enough reason for her to be there.

It's time for lunch; I'm starving and even the salad I'm having looks scrumptious.