and counting. Counting down to March 2nd and my up close encounter with my ortho doctor. I suppose an optimist would say "counting up" till the time of surgery and the near future when my knee will be replaced, when I'll be fixed. I should be looking forward to this but I'm not. Right now I can stand and walk; not far and not for long but I still can. A month from March 2nd I should be able to do the same once again. Maybe I should be focusing on March 31st instead of March 2nd.
March 31st I should be able to walk pain free from room to room and maybe even outside. I should be walker free and using my walking stick. I should have more range of motion established with the metal knee. I should be looking forward to this but I'm not. I still have those weeks before I arrive at March 31st.
I warned ya in the title that this is a bitch fest. It' s my blog; I can bitch and whine. This is my diary/journal and this is how I feel right now.
Give me a few hours and I'll be past this. It seems to loom sporadically, this feeling as the time draws nearer. The worst part is the waiting and the knowing. My sister who needs knee replacements X2 says she wants the doctor to do hers the day after he tells her she needs surgery. She wants to bypass the waiting.
I wait for surgery. I wait to heal. I wait to walk. I suppose we all wait for different reasons.
I've waited for payday. I've waited for vacation, for dinner, and in numerous lines to get what I needed or wanted. I should be looking forward to this but I'm not! Call me in a month; I should be past this. Another wait.