Thursday, December 6, 2012

Munchausin or Give Me ALL that Attention!

An interesting article. Go ahead. Read it.

I've found some interesting characters online. Oh the wonderful world wide web, you've entertained me for years and years. What did I ever do before your existence?

She mourns. She posts her mourning daily. After a few years, what comment can anyone make. It's now down to a "like" and very  few comment to follow her postings. Facebook has become her bulletin board. Her Munchhausen sympathy call; attention gathered, the spotlight to shine each day a few minutes on her.....and some people begin to notice.

He lost a son. The mourning publicly is daily. Two years have passed and still he posts his heartbreak. Along with these posts, he expresses anger at relatives for not celebrating the birthday of this son that has passed. His rants fill his Facebook page and are ignored.

Both of these people have their own guilt to deal with relating to these people they have lost. One was callous in her dealings with him; impatient and cruel in her verbal responses, the other encouraged drinking with his son at an early age and his loss of his son was directly related to alcohol he surmise.
Their pain from their losses are more severe they proclaim then what others suffer when they face a loss.  Every opportunity is taken to bring to the forefront of a conversation or even apparently a Facebook posting to remind others of their loss, their pain and their unhappiness. 

Attention seeking behavior and  relentless postings proclaiming their pain reeks of Munchhausen with a heavy dose of guilt.
This was bought to my attention from a post a few weeks ago on, where else, Facebook!  Someone posted an article. Apparently the two cases mentioned were not isolated examples.  The article posted mentioned Munchhausen was usually a female trait but not entirely limited to females and was used to define women that used their children as a means of attention  by causing to the child illness or injury, taking them in for treatment and collecting the sympathy of the staff and friends that were there for emotional support. The frequency of these incidents eventually alerts the professionals to what is happening.
Frequency. That's the biggest clue to be aware of. Normal grieving wanes. Though never entirely free of loss, an acceptance is reached.
An interesting article for sure. I've searched for it when I started writing this blog and should I find it at a later date, I'll do a postscript and post it here with a note to update.
I have a busy day planned. I want to do some cleaning on my 23 year old Toyota that the granddaughter drives now. Yesterday was spent putting new tires on it and today I want to change the oil and detail the interior before returning it to her. If time allows, I'll try to make it to Carrie's school to have lunch with her.
As we lay in bed last night, I listened to her conversations about people and friends. Carrie is an observer. She stands back and watches other children's behavior especially if it's unbecoming behavior. She recognizes the cruelness of some of the other children and doesn't participate. She observes and last night she was telling me of what she sees. I murmur softly, never offering any comment unless she questions. The more quiet I stay, the more she shares. Even seven year old need to vent; need to hear their own thoughts in words aloud and I let her have this. I learn a lot about this little girl this way. I'm so grateful that I have the time to just lay quietly and listen. No thought of  a job the next day or any mandatory activities fill my own mind. I can relax and give my time to this child and I love it.
Soon she will leave her bed and this house and be exposed to an outer world that we would have preferred to keep her sheltered from.  She must learn the ways of the world in order to make it along her own path and we have to accept this for her own welfare.
I must get started if I intend to make that lunch date with Ms. Carrie. The look on her face of pure delight when she notices me waiting in the hall for her is worth the drive and the time spent for lunch!

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