Saturday, February 1, 2014

If You Really Want to Know

Family! Those people that grew up in the same house with you, those cousins seen on the weekends; the family, those folks that interjected themselves into your life without consent agreed upon.

Hopefully that family is not a toxic situation. To really know how they truly feel about you, make one of them angry. Recently I posted about a lad that I had observed while visiting a family member. Watching this child and his mother's parenting (or lack of) the post was anonymous. No names were used; no reference to it being a family member. The mother, unable to face reality, became quite incensed when another family member recognized the subject   and informed this mother. Mom is in denial. My question to this is, "how did that family member reading that post recognize the child/parent". Mom doesn't believe that her child is the big topic of conversation related to his behavior.
Mom sent massive mailings. Acid filled mailings detailing how the family really felt about me. This information gleaned from one sibling who relishes any moment she can insert knife and twist. Mom repeats all those accusations she has learned from this sibling.
I left this family 43 years ago. I haven't lived around them since I was about 22 yrs. old. I am now 65. I'm totally amazed that any family member knew much about me as I made infrequent trips back except to visit my mother.
I've been accused of hitting my mother; sleeping with everybody through the alphabet, being cruel, hating my daughter and grandchildren and being hated by everybody in this family.
I can only say, "I'm glad I moved away when I did and put 2000 miles between myself and "the family". Can you imagine what I would have been tagged with had I lived in the same town all these years?

Nothing aggravates me more then someone lying to me. You can lie and then become incensed when someone calls you on it? That's when I jump ship and swim away from you. I have a cousin who posts unsubstantiated political stuff on Facebook and then becomes very angry when research shows the post to be propaganda. Do some investigating before you post silly stuff and if, failing that, don't become all irate when bullshit is called on you.

I watch from afar the behavior of family members and realize that I would never have selected many of them to be friends nor spent any time with them even if I lived closer. Selfishness plagues many of them. Their parents are left alone, deserted by their children they have devoted their whole lives to making sure these little precious offspring have everything they need or want. When the time comes for role reversal, the tides have marched out to sea, not a child to be found to assist or care for them.

I observe and rarely interact. These are the same people that are busily noting my life and creating tales while living 2000 miles from me. These people, the mom, says she has been told stories about me all her life and she believes them. Huh? I don't recall visits from any of these people except for an occasional two or three days from a select few.

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